All I can say is that most US companies don’t truly understand or value work/life balance. Seriously… who’s ready to sponsor us in Canada. Any good jobs up there? From this you may gather that my job is… well just a job. It may have been my dream opportunity a few years back but things have shifted.
My values have changed and this job isn’t as fulfilling as I imagined. The company isn’t outwardly unaccepting and actually they’ve been very accommodating of my pumping. When they first found me a place to pump it didn’t have an outlet, so they paid for all the rechargeable batteries and fancy 8 battery charger. But it’s the atmosphere that’s hard. I’m managing construction/development for a large restaurant chain and the restaurant industry works/plays very hard. People are in early, stay late and finish the day going to happy hour. Usually at one of our restaurant’s. I honestly hate how much I’m not feeling it.
I find myself rushing in and rushing home. I find I get distracted and restless. I find things just don’t compare to the importance of raising our girls. I hate how much of them I miss… how much they’re learning and this comes full circle by reminding me just how much I’m missing. I love that they’re home with their MamaJ but the guilt hasn’t subsided as I thought it would. I long for better balance. Or maybe just a more passion filled career. Am I crazy for thinking about going back to school. That’s rhetorical, I know I am but I can’t help thinking about it.
But for the moment. We get tons of questions on how we do it. Usually in reference to raising twins. People are fascinated by it. To us well… it’s all we know. We never did one at a time, so this seems totally normal. And honestly more and more (as things have become easier) I’m advocating that all babies come with twins. It’s just so cool! They’re so connected and aware of each other already. It’s incredible to witness their bond developing. Don’t get me wrong it’s crazy hard too. People watch us in awe at times as we squat and lift both babies, carry them together and especially when out shopping. I feel the looks but really this is our normal. Wednesday’s I do our nighttime routine solo and yes its extremely challenging but they’re accustomed to waiting at times. Bath time is hard but will get easier as they get older. I’ve thought about skipping it when solo but they love it so much. So we adapt it and it works. Sometimes we are in the tub less and read more. Sometimes we read more and swim less. It just depends on their moods.
I thought it would be worthwhile to document how my girls are spending their time. With or without me these ladies like a schedule and it has become pretty consistent. They anticipate things and know when something has changed or is missing.6:30 wake / change/nurse (Daylight savings has messed with us a bit but we’re recovering) 7:00 play / mommy solo playtime 7:45 bookend nurse (our morning top off before I leave for work) 8:30 first nap 9:30 wake / bottles / solids 10:00 playtime 11:30 second nap 12:30 wake / bottle / solids 1pm playtime / outside time / walk 3-3:30 last nap 4:15 wake / play 4:45 mommy gets home / nurse 5:00 mommy solo playtime 5:45 bath time 6:45 last nurse 7:00 down for the night 1-3:00AM one dream feed 6:30 Awake for the day Bonus photo for making it to the end: